Fontana Cottage — Souvenir Shop

On the main road in Fontana stands a small establishment that looks like an ordinary shop from outside. Inside, however, lies a treasury that makes the Grand Master's cellars seem empty. Shelves groan with Gozitan specialties: sheep's cheese (the Order suspects it is produced by wizards), olives marinated in herbs, sun-dried tomatoes the colour of rubies, artichokes in olive oil, capers the size of peas, and nougat so hard it could serve as siege projectiles. But the real treasure hangs on the walls and sits on display racks: Gozo lace, handmade by local women for generations. Each pattern tells a different story — fish, flowers, Maltese crosses. Explorer Bartek bought a doily for his mother and could not explain why it cost as much as his training sword. The Commander clarified: because the doily required more hours of work. Cheese tasting is free. I repeat: FREE. The lady behind the counter slices ġbejna (goat cheese) with the precision of someone portioning a tactical map. After the third piece, Explorer Bartek asked if he could move in. TACTICAL NOTE: The shop is on the main road in Fontana — easy to miss when driving. Stop! Cheese and nougat will survive the journey home. Lace is the only Gozo souvenir you cannot buy at the airport. The Order rates: 4.5 shields out of 5. Half a shield deducted because after free cheese tasting, it is impossible to leave empty-handed. Then again, perhaps that is precisely the point.